12.19.2007

Haiti deserves an apology

In the 90's, whenever one wanted to explain why more home runs were being hit in baseball, the scapegoat became Haiti. Baseballs used by MLB were manufactured in Haiti. I remember all these theories about how baseballs were being wound tighter by the impoverished Haitian workers, creating a "rabbit ball" which "jumped" off the bat. Turns out it was a bunch of testicle-shrunken-roid-ragers reponsible for the inflated numbers. So, Haiti, on behalf of the United States and Canada, we're sorry.

Oh, I should state that I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm sure there's science backing up the rabbit ball theory, it just seems like we always have to scapegoat some impoverished non-white group of people.

Also, I don't really give a shit about steroids. I mean, I do, but I don't. I'm not thrilled about it, but it's been obvious for a while, so I wish people would quit faking their outrage about it. Yes, I will keep watching baseball, keep going to games, keep rooting for the Padres. It's friggin entertainment. I'll save my outrage for something more important.
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