7.12.2006

Osama Bin Laden Vs. Nix's Check Cashing

If you want to know why I’m so cynical and jaded about the good 'ol U.S. of A, I guess this is as good of an example as I can think of to explain why.

As you may know, the Department of Homeland Security recently cut anti-terrorism funding to New York (after all, terrorists wouldn't target New York, right?). They did this because they did not list places such as Empire State Building, Statue of Liberty, or the Brooklyn Bridge historical landmarks that might be targeted. Rumor has it they're not very smart.

So what kind of stuff did they include on the list? I am not making this up:
  • Old MacDonald’s Petting Zoo in Woodville, Alabama
  • Mule Day Parade in Columbia, Tennesee
  • Amish Country Popcorn in Indiana
  • Sweetwater Flea Market in Knoxville, Tennessee
Plus, there were vague references to such national treasures such as:
  • “Nix’s Check Cashing,”
  • “Mall at Sears”
  • “Ice Cream Parlor”
  • “Tackle Shop”
  • “Donut Shop”
  • “Anti-Cruelty Society”
  • ”Bean Fest.”
  • “Beach at End of a Street”
Ah, Bean Fest. There's some memories. I remember a Sears at the mall in El Cajon, but can't quite recall the Mall at Sears. And I guess there's a good chance that there are cops at any donut shop, so what the hell.

Furthermore, if you add up the total number of potential targets by state, California has 3,212 potential targets, New York has 5,687, and Indiana, yes, INDY FUCKING ANA, has 8,591.

The temptation is to laugh. But think about it a little deeper. This is sad. This is heartbreaking. Is this how you want your country run? When you think of September 11th, and then look at this kind of idiotic response, are you truly proud to be American?

Well, I guess if you live in Indiana...

3 comments:

  1. C'mon, you're making this shit up right?!? What the fuck? Very crazy stuff. I can at least sleep well at night knowing my local pastry shop is well protected. This article is funny. Mind if I link it from my blog?

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  2. Not at all, I just saw your blog...good stuff, those Zidane pics are hilarious...I will link it.

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  3. Anonymous07:30

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