chargers v panthers game blog

1st quarter
  • Initial impression: DeAngelo Williams and Jonathan Stewart are looking like a formidable running back duo. 
  • I am already sick of this Fox robot thingymabob. What is the point of this? Is their target demographic 8-year-olds?
  • Once again, uninspired, unimaginative play calling for the Chargers. 
  • I have no idea what this Bill Gates/Jerry Seinfeld commercial is supposed to mean. Did I accidentally get high?
2nd quarter
  • Bend but don't break defensive schemes are not good for my health. 
  • 9-7 Carolina, but it hasn't been that close. Could easily be 21-7. San Diego usually make the proper adjustments in the second half. We'll see. 
3rd Quarter
  • This run Tomilinson off tackle is getting so old. I know the philosophy is to wear the defense down, and usually by the 3rd quarter it starts to work, but I don't have to like it. C'mon, Find a way to get it to LT in open space, Norv. 
  • Okay, this is why I'm not a head coach. Aforementioned philosophy is starting to pay dividends. 
  • Where's Sproles?
  • As I type that, enter Sproles. 
  • Drive fizzles. FG good. 10-7 Chargers. 
  • What the hell is "initial quality" in vehicles? Shouldn't I care more about eventual quality than initial quality?
  • Latest holding call ever. They were done with the sack replay before I even knew there was a flag.
  • Ugh. More LT up the middle. 
  • Oh Jesus Christ. Panthers strip Gates, return the ball for an easy touchdown. This is a pathetic display so far, Chargers. Looks like we'll be back to hating Norv in no time. 16-10 Panthers. 
  • LT up the middle. Are you fucking kidding me?
4th Quarter
  • After a first-down killing hold, 3 and out. This game is lost. Chargers have absolutely no spark. Nice play calling, Norv, you douchebag.
  • The defense is certainly not to blame for this debacle. Panthers field goal makes it 19-10 Panthers.
  • Nobody on the Charger's offense has played horribly. But they are just running plays that are called. And those plays are horrible. Yet I'm sure Rivers will be the scapegoat. 
  • Oh yeah, Vincent Jackson is on the team. Nice to find out in THE FOURTH QUARTER.
  • Another Jackson catch. Do I sense a spark? 
  • Rivers to Gates, touchdown San Diego. As awkward as Philips throwing style is, it works. As much as a prick he can be, I like him. 19-17 Panthers. See what happens when you open it up a little, Norv? 
  • Defense has been clutch. This would kinda sorta be a good time to keep that going.
  • Forced fumble, Chargers recover. That would kinda sorta qualify as clutch. 
  • LT up the middle, saved by a defensive holding penalty. It's called momentum Norv, seize it. 
  • LT up the middle for 8 yards. Genius call!
  • Lt to the outside (yes!), 9 yard gain. 
  • Back to back up the middle carries by LT and Sproles get only a few yards. This back and forth between loving and hating Norv Turner is not good for my mental state. 
  • Rivers to Jackson, touchdown San Diego. I was confident of this all along. I was just trying to throw you off earlier. 24-19 Chargers. 
  • In past years, this is where the Charger defense has collapsed. They have been unable to finish an oppenent when they are down. 
  • Like that, Carolina is across the 50. 
  • Fuck. 2 seconds left. One play from the Chargers 13.
  • Touchdown Carolina. 
  • Fuck.
  • If I was a betting man, I'd be rich.
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